I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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