You're completely useless in the revolution.
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
