I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
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