One girl and one boy is just not enough.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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