she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
