Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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