Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize
