i would punch a child for taco bell
i was born a porn star she said
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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