I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
