Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
You made out with two different species that night
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
you made out with another girl for some wings
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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