is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize
