i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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