How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
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