Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
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