So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize