Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Randomize
