I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
My Higher Power is John Stamos
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
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