Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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