The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
