I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Randomize
