I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
