Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
