How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
