we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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