Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize