don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
