yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
