Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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