She said her name was "party"
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
