I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
My feet surprised me
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
