It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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