Don't make out with my wife yet
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
