I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
