kristin has been a bad kristin
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize