haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
false alarm. still invincible.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
