Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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