this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
My dick has a subreddit
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
