Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
