He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize