is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize