69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
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