Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
