yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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