There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
