Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Randomize
