Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
