Whoa Z and x make the same sound
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
