in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Still dying that you shit outside
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
