Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
