I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
try to milk me bitch
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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