And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
